The 2022 Darwin Awards

[727Sky]

From an Email;

Subject: The 2022 Darwin Awards

Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.

Here is the glorious winner:

When his .38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim
during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James
Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder.
He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it

worked.

The honorable mentions:

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting
machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his
insurance company. The company, expecting negligence, sent out one of
its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also
lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car
during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a
woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting
from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his
incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone

waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre

fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head
wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received
the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see
how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the
counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer,
the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register,
which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the
clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of

cash he got from the drawer? $15.[If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?]


Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that
he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab
some booze, and run. So, he lifted the cinder block and heaved it
over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit
the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor
store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on

videotape.

As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man

grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the
woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher.
Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in
the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of
the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he
replied, Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse

from.
The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a

Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and

demanded cash.The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... The frustrated gunman
walked away.

[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]

When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street by sucking on a hose, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon
hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the
vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh
he'd ever had and the perp had been punished enough!

In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with friends
and family... unless of course one of these individuals by chance is
a distant relative or long-lost friend. In that case, be glad they
are distant and hope they remain lost.

Remember... They walk among us and they can reproduce! And they Vote!

[p358]

From an Email;

Subject: The 2022 Darwin Awards

Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.

Here is the glorious winner:

When his .38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim
during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James
Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder.
He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it

worked.

The honorable mentions:

The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting
machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his
insurance company. The company, expecting negligence, sent out one of
its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also
lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car
during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a
woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting
from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his
incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone

waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre

fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head
wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received
the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see
how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the
counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer,
the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register,
which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the
clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of

cash he got from the drawer? $15.[If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?]


Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that
he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab
some booze, and run. So, he lifted the cinder block and heaved it
over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit
the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor
store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on

videotape.

As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man

grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the
woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher.
Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in
the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of
the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he
replied, Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse

from.
The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a

Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and

demanded cash.The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... The frustrated gunman
walked away.

[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]

When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street by sucking on a hose, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon
hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the
vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh
he'd ever had and the perp had been punished enough!

In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with friends
and family... unless of course one of these individuals by chance is
a distant relative or long-lost friend. In that case, be glad they
are distant and hope they remain lost.

Remember... They walk among us and they can reproduce! And they Vote!

"A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon

hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake."

"Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong."

Lol

P

[BIAD]

Reading these accounts makes me wonder if we really did go to the moon!!

[727Sky]

Reading these accounts makes me wonder if we really did go to the moon!!

In every cesspool there there are a few floaters even though most go straight to the bottom ! We sent the floaters and did not select the bottom feeders !! hahah