Who Is This Marshall Guy

[EndtheMadnessNow]

And why is everyone talking about his law?

Well, it was a huge week, in which vast amounts of noise was made, with little or nothing achieved. It wasn’t a complete loss. Our abs got a thorough workout from laughing.

Among other things, Trump declared martial law in Washington DC. According to Lincoln’s General Order 100 (a.k.a. the Lieber Code), when civilian institutions of governance cease to function, military intervention is authorized. Few people would argue—with a straight face—that DC’s civil structure was still functioning.

Of course, most of the folks howling bloody murder (see what I did there?) think that Washington DC is like any other part of the country. Washing and the various possessions and territories (Virgin Islands, Guam, Puerto Rico, etc.) are territories under federal jurisdiction and supposedly run by CONgress.

Like all its other important functions, CONgress long ago allowed civilians to pretend to administer their own affairs. However, court decisions over the last 200 years have held that DC is a federal district and not a state, under the plenary jurisdiction of CONgress. Trump, as the executor of the laws passed by CONgress, decided to actually do the job that his office is supposed to do in Washington.

Despite Trump’s threats, he can’t do the same thing in other cities without being invited by the governors or mayors of those cities. The only way he could activate General Order 100 in a state, is if the elected offices were vacant and the courts had ceased to function.

As for the US being a fascist nation, well of course it is. It has been since at least the 1870s. The US has essentially been run by corporations for well over a century, with the take-over finalized by the Citizen United v. FEC (2010) Supreme Court ruling. If you don’t believe me, look at any photo of the House of Representatives dais, and note the giant symbols on either side of the Speaker.

Trump is not the first, just the latest.

Of course, Martial Law was just a distraction from the “sudden” Putin-Trump summit in Alaska (Seward’s Folly)—formerly Russian territory sold by Alexander II to Andrew Johnson for a little over $7 million.

This exercise was a bit like a giant therapy session, with both sides hearing and understanding each other, but not much else getting done for all the hype. The media, naturally, were silenced so they wouldn’t disrupt the warm fuzzies.

Even though Trump makes scenes over the way other people dress around him, I noted that on the red carpet, his coat was unbuttoned and his belly festooned. Putin was the only participant with a fashion sense.

It was most gratifying to see and hear the EU Brat Pack huffing and puffing the whole week. Listening to Van der Loon, Macaroon and Stormer shrieking and wailing was far more entertaining than any of the other characters or events. Clearly, Europe doesn’t want the gravy train to stop. Seems everyone down the line has been getting full scoops of US taxpayer dollars via the Great Laundry Machine, known as the Ukraine.

It was notable that the infamous Polish mass murderer Binyamin Mileikowsky, currently using the nom du guerre Bibi Nuttyahoo, was uncharacteristically quiet this past week. One assumes he was told to take a break from razing Gaza so that global attention could be trained on Trump’s great peace initiative (which apparently doesn’t include Gaza).

In the meantime, Indonesia’s ruling junta had the fear of Allah put into it by the mere sight of an anime-inspired banner from the series One Piece. Millions of folks across the country have taken to trolling offishuldum with the show’s Jolly Roger for the sinking economy, rising taxes and utterly uninspired regulatory framework killing the business environment. It’s rather inspired and chuckle-worthy to see authoritarians in a blind panic over an emblem from a cartoon that has been running for 26 years.



And in a final note of hilarity, much like the proverbial cherry sitting atop the banana split of history, the Dullard Clan (commonly known as the Bush crime family) seems to have gotten tired of cowering on their 100,000-acre estate in Paraguay, and are now looking to retake the US before Tulsi Gabbard starts looking into 9/11 and the Gulf War sequel.


All in all, it’s been a fun week, with thrills and chills and no a few guffaws. As we hoist the One Piece Jolly Roger, prepare popcorn to see Elensky (he banned the letter Z) in a business suit, and stand by to see if Trump can beat Lady Lindsey and the Senate to a peace deal before the next session begins, we note the old adage that laughter is the best medicine, and tis past week has left us feeling hale and hearty.

Next up, Jina and Taiwan.

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For our celluloid enjoyment, only one of the best comedies of all time will do, which is why your cultural assignment today is Some Like It Hot (1959), with Tony Curtis, Jack Lemmon and Marilyn Monroe, and directed by the master Billy Wilder. Either that, or binge-watch the original Police Squad! (1982) TeeVee show.