Prepare to DIE!!

[FCD]

I wasn't sure where to put this thread, so I stuck it here.

The title of a news article today says..."3 City-killing asteroids could strike Earth within weeks - generating a million times more damage than Hiroshima"...  That's the actual headline, I kid you not!  You can read it for yourself (here)

3 City-killing asteroids could strike Earth within weeks

So, I guess we should all prepare to DIE! 

I wonder, do we have enough time to TAX ourselves to death before the asteroids incinerate the planet???  Can we stop worrying about global warming now?  Do I have to pay my Amex bill this month?  Hang on while I call Domino's Pizza and order (5) triple sausage pies and a couple fifths of Jack Daniels...gonna' party like it's the end of the freaking world!

But WAIT!!

Well, for those who took the time to READ the WHOLE article, and not just the first 64 characters (which seems to be the World's attention span these days), there's a twist.  You see, if you made it to the last sentence of the entire piece, it says...the orbits of these asteroids won't become unstable (the thing which "might" (i.e. maybe) send them in our direction) for another 150 years.  Wait WHAT??  But, but...you said "within weeks", right; what gives!?!?  Well, you see, IF the asteroids head towards Earth (150 years from now), then it will only take them 'weeks' to get here.  Frigging DOOM PORN media!  This is a perfect example of it too; the media twisting the English language to get people all spun up over nothing. 

(yes, I'm ranting)

So, the only responsible thing I see for the residents of Earth to do right now is...RAISE TAXES!  In these dire times, we need to undertake staggering actions, and raising taxes by 90% is the ONLY responsible thing to do.

Can I cancel my Domino's order now???

/extreme sarcasm

That is all.

[Michigan Swamp Buck]

But, we should prepare to die with Life Insurance. That's the three P's, Price, Price, Price! That's the message, right?

[FCD]

Personally, I think it's to prep everyone for more taxes or something.  "The world is doomed, and the only way we (the politicians who can't fix anything) can fix it is by giving us more money!"

Mo' Money!
Mo' Money!
Mo' Money!

Sing it with me, y'all!  .... Mo' Money!

[EndtheMadnessNow]

But, but, 150 years is just "a blip in the interstellar timescale."

Better get yer bunker ready, ya only got weeks!



Yep, NY Post and their sister across the pond are infamous for such headlines and always competing with each other for clicks.

[Bally002]

July 5th.  My guess.  If not yoo hoo.

Kind regards,

Bally)

[kdog]

I was hoping it would until I looked up the asteroid names on https://cneos.jpl.nasa.gov/ca/

[FCD]

ETMN, I'm clutching my survival biscuits so hard I crushed the can!

[Cvastar]

Thanks for the laugh.  Yea, I read more than 64 characters, not because I'm smart, but because I've  come to recognize the "ploy".  Ever more, almost all of the media out there leads with a "shock" eyeball grabber and then, ends with the "gotcha".  So anymore, I read through these articles just to check the "gotcha".

In all honesty though, most of the time, I see a headline like that and don't even bother to read the article..........I already know the ending and I'm really tired of the "flash" ads.

[FCD]

Cvastar -Well, I figure most here on RN are bright enough to read more than 64 characters, so I wasn't particularly worried about that statement applying to members here.