Mood Music

[EndtheMadnessNow]

Personal note: 50 years ago or so, I took the ASVAB and scored 97%. A Navy recruiter was hard after me after that incident, said I could "write my own ticket in the Navy", pick whatever speciality I wanted, although he was pushing nuclear pretty hard. This song was a major reason I declined. Instead I went Rogue with the individual pursuit of foreign policy - which was more frowned upon then even than it is now. They called us "whores of war", which I reckon makes me a reformed whore... maybe not all that reformed, upon further reflection. I still don't mind lightin' a bastard up if he needs it.

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Really?! You brought back some memories. Well, ain't that somethin! In slightly more recent times I too scored a 97%. Like you, my recruiter had a gleam of light in his eyes and was doing everything he could to get me to go in the nuclear field. Told him I need to think about it for a few days. Called my dad and he said I should give my cousin a call and ask him. He was a nuke in the Navy. So, I called him and he told me unless you really had an easy time in high school mathematics & physics and don't mind spending a few years buried in books & very long study hours, go for it...otherwise steer clear. I wasn't much of a math wizard so I chose the next 2nd hardest school in the Navy, a Combat Data Systems technician...which at the time had a 35% drop out rate. Somehow I made it through including the NSA crypto school.

The only time we had a few guys onboard dress up as drag queens was for the Crossing the Line Shellback initiation aka "Wog Day". Did that 3 times and of course your first time is (was back in the real Navy, unlike today) absolutely terrifying. About a week before the ceremony you see all the shellback's making firehose whips and letting them soak in sea water for days. What are those for? "You'll find out pollywog, haha."

Those firehose shillelagh's were bloody brutal! Crawling through the gauntlet, shellbacks armed with shillelagh's and paddles followed by wading through pig troughs of the most foul smelling disgusting soup garbage one can imagine, along with cayenne pepper drinks followed by much puking, a host of other rituals, then baptized by King Neptune and finally striping down butt naked, throwing all your clothes overboard and then hosed off with a firehose. Then you spend a good 30 minutes in the shower scrubbing down using every available scented soap & shampoo onboard, dry off and we each take turns bandaging each other's ass. I know it sounds sick to most folks, but that's how you become a band of blood brothers back in the real Navy days...All for one, and one for all!

Wouldn't you know it within days of crossing the line my first time I had also made E-5, so I got beaten twice back to back, though the Shellback party was much worse. Afterward, 3 of us became true blood brothers known as the 3 Musketeers...which that in of itself has alot sea stories.

My 2nd & 3rd time I finally got to dish out much needed beatings on the new guys and the only time you as enlisted are authorized to physically beat Officers! There will be blood and the blood did flow across the weather decks with much crying & whimpering and the weapons officer suffered immensely, his pain became legendary and he had to use a pillow to sit down for a week. Ah, it was glorious payback! No hard feelings sir, and our first port of call somewhere in SE Asia we all got shitfaced together, a couple of bar room brawls followed by Marines coming to our rescue. Ah, them were the good 'ole days!

Some glory day pics...



No, not what you're thinking. This is where you get your face smashed into the smelly belly:



The line-up. Circled are the shillelagh's:









Quick summary on Crossing the Line Rite if you have no idea.

Shellbacks: A Proud Naval Tradition!