You know, when people contemplate the Crusades in modern times, the most common thought is..."These other (foreign) people were trying to exterminate our religion, and that's why the Crusades happened. Christianity Rules!!" I mean, I know this sounds silly, but that's about all the due it is given in western education systems. It's like..."Okay so, Noah loaded all these cool animals in a boat, then it rained, and then Jesus came. Jesus was awesome. After that, this really cool period in history happened called the "Dark Ages" where people burned all the books (and partied all the time). So, we don't know a lot about that. Then the Crusades happened where these brave men killed all the infidels and non-believers. And this brings us up to one of the most interesting times in history, the "Middle Ages" where there were there were Kings and princesses, castles and knights on horseback and all sorts of other cool stuff." The really kind of funny part is, I just covered History lessons in Grades 1-6. Sadly, now though, even that tiny bit of education has been corrupted by the liberal education system.
Now the education system in the west is like..."Okay, so the woman appeared one day, we won't get into the 'how' part. Then she invented fire, and after that the wheel. Woman was happy with the wheel and fire for a really, really, long time. Then the cis-gender people showed up. Woman celebrated this arrival, and life was good, there was total harmony on Earth. But then men showed up...and they fucked everything up. These bastards ate all the food, murdered all the pretty birds and beat the shit out of all the innocent cis-gendered people...and women too (or so they say). Then the plagues happened, which was God's way of trying to kill this new parasite called "men". Then the Dark Ages happened, where all the men burned everything, including all the history books which PROVED beyond any reasonable doubt that the WOMAN and MIDDLE-SEX people were here first and were the more superior beings. But that's all gone now. Destroyed by, yep, you guessed it...MEN! But not just any men..."WHITE" men. Then the Crusades happened, which was men's way of showing off their over the top toxic masculinity. Now, keep in mind here, children...these were all "WHITE" men doing all this pillaging and slaughtering. All the women, cis-genders and colored folk had NOTHING to do with it! Remember this kids...NOTHING! The women and cis-genders would have done it completely differently. We would have talked about it behind their backs, gossiped about it, and created a couple reality shows. Yeah sure, there would have been a few cat-fights here and there, but the streets wouldn't have run red with blood like what all the "WHITE" men did. Not even close! So after this, there were a bunch of gay Kings which was a really interesting period (much more on this later). And right after that the "WHITE" men were back at it again, this time destroying the environment and creating "Global Warming". And ever since then it has just gotten worse. And that is World history from the beginning until now. So, after class today, children, you will find a confessional just outside the classroom where you can apologize to whatever higher power you believe in, or you can just masturbate in the parking lot, and right next to that you will find a pit full of spikes which you can hurl yourself into. And, it's okay...we'll notify your Mom you did the right thing."
Now the education system in the west is like..."Okay, so the woman appeared one day, we won't get into the 'how' part. Then she invented fire, and after that the wheel. Woman was happy with the wheel and fire for a really, really, long time. Then the cis-gender people showed up. Woman celebrated this arrival, and life was good, there was total harmony on Earth. But then men showed up...and they fucked everything up. These bastards ate all the food, murdered all the pretty birds and beat the shit out of all the innocent cis-gendered people...and women too (or so they say). Then the plagues happened, which was God's way of trying to kill this new parasite called "men". Then the Dark Ages happened, where all the men burned everything, including all the history books which PROVED beyond any reasonable doubt that the WOMAN and MIDDLE-SEX people were here first and were the more superior beings. But that's all gone now. Destroyed by, yep, you guessed it...MEN! But not just any men..."WHITE" men. Then the Crusades happened, which was men's way of showing off their over the top toxic masculinity. Now, keep in mind here, children...these were all "WHITE" men doing all this pillaging and slaughtering. All the women, cis-genders and colored folk had NOTHING to do with it! Remember this kids...NOTHING! The women and cis-genders would have done it completely differently. We would have talked about it behind their backs, gossiped about it, and created a couple reality shows. Yeah sure, there would have been a few cat-fights here and there, but the streets wouldn't have run red with blood like what all the "WHITE" men did. Not even close! So after this, there were a bunch of gay Kings which was a really interesting period (much more on this later). And right after that the "WHITE" men were back at it again, this time destroying the environment and creating "Global Warming". And ever since then it has just gotten worse. And that is World history from the beginning until now. So, after class today, children, you will find a confessional just outside the classroom where you can apologize to whatever higher power you believe in, or you can just masturbate in the parking lot, and right next to that you will find a pit full of spikes which you can hurl yourself into. And, it's okay...we'll notify your Mom you did the right thing."