"Unk" was a trip, I lost him not all that long ago. He was big into the A.I.D.S. conspiracies and did research at the college libraries before there was an internet available. He had me thinking whenever I talked with him.
He really liked cannibal jokes. This is for you Unk . . .
Why are cannibals so angry?
They’re fed up with people.
What did Sparticus do to the cannibal who ate his nagging wife?
Nothing, he’s gladiator.
Why didn’t the cannibal eat the guy with no feet?
Because he was lack toes intolerant.
How does a cannibal say hello?
He offers you a handshake.
What’s a British cannibal’s favorite meal?
Fish and chaps.
Why did the cannibal always introduce his friends to each other?
Because he liked to have people meat.
A police officer was assigned to hunt a dangerous cannibal on his first day on the job.
All the more seasoned officers had already been eaten.
I went to a cannibal restaurant last night.
It cost $50 a head.
A cannibal invites a friend around for dinner.
As they’re tucking into the starter, the guest says, “Wow. Your wife make a lovely stew.”
“I know,” answers the host. “I sure will miss her.”
Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer.
One says to the other, “Does this taste funny to you?”
The other says, “No.”
What do cannibal hitmen eat?
Take-out food.
What do cannibals ingest to freshen their breath?
Men toes.
What’s a cannibal’s favorite game?
Swallow the leader.
I don’t care what vegetarians eat. Cannibals on the other hand…
Where’s my other hand?
What do you give a cannibal who’s late for dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What do you call a war between two cannibal tribes?
A food fight.
What happened when the missionary visited the cannibal tribe?
They got a taste of religion.
Two explorers are captured by cannibals and put in a large pot of water over a fire. As the water gets hotter and hotter, one starts giggling uncontrollably.
The second explorer says, “We’re going to die here and they are going to eat us! What on earth is so funny?” The first guy says, “I just peed in their soup!”
I just found out that a distant relative of mine was a cannibal and ate 3 people. That’s a lot to digest.
What do cannibals drink in the morning?
A cup of Joe.
Did you hear about the arrogant cannibal who started eating himself?
He was so full of himself.
What’s a cannibal’s favorite snack?
A knuckle sandwich.
What do you call a class that teaches how to cook and eat people?
A cannibal lecture.
Cannibal son, during dinner: Mom, I have to tell you something. I don’t like grandpa.
Cannibal mom: Then try the potatoes instead.
After many years of traveling the globe, an explorer was recently eaten by cannibals. He died as he lived, a seasoned traveler.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his butt.
He really liked cannibal jokes. This is for you Unk . . .
Why are cannibals so angry?
They’re fed up with people.
What did Sparticus do to the cannibal who ate his nagging wife?
Nothing, he’s gladiator.
Why didn’t the cannibal eat the guy with no feet?
Because he was lack toes intolerant.
How does a cannibal say hello?
He offers you a handshake.
What’s a British cannibal’s favorite meal?
Fish and chaps.
Why did the cannibal always introduce his friends to each other?
Because he liked to have people meat.
A police officer was assigned to hunt a dangerous cannibal on his first day on the job.
All the more seasoned officers had already been eaten.
I went to a cannibal restaurant last night.
It cost $50 a head.
A cannibal invites a friend around for dinner.
As they’re tucking into the starter, the guest says, “Wow. Your wife make a lovely stew.”
“I know,” answers the host. “I sure will miss her.”
Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer.
One says to the other, “Does this taste funny to you?”
The other says, “No.”
What do cannibal hitmen eat?
Take-out food.
What do cannibals ingest to freshen their breath?
Men toes.
What’s a cannibal’s favorite game?
Swallow the leader.
I don’t care what vegetarians eat. Cannibals on the other hand…
Where’s my other hand?
What do you give a cannibal who’s late for dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What do you call a war between two cannibal tribes?
A food fight.
What happened when the missionary visited the cannibal tribe?
They got a taste of religion.
Two explorers are captured by cannibals and put in a large pot of water over a fire. As the water gets hotter and hotter, one starts giggling uncontrollably.
The second explorer says, “We’re going to die here and they are going to eat us! What on earth is so funny?” The first guy says, “I just peed in their soup!”
I just found out that a distant relative of mine was a cannibal and ate 3 people. That’s a lot to digest.
What do cannibals drink in the morning?
A cup of Joe.
Did you hear about the arrogant cannibal who started eating himself?
He was so full of himself.
What’s a cannibal’s favorite snack?
A knuckle sandwich.
What do you call a class that teaches how to cook and eat people?
A cannibal lecture.
Cannibal son, during dinner: Mom, I have to tell you something. I don’t like grandpa.
Cannibal mom: Then try the potatoes instead.
After many years of traveling the globe, an explorer was recently eaten by cannibals. He died as he lived, a seasoned traveler.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his butt.
A trail goes two ways and looks different in each direction - There is no such thing as a timid woodland creature - Whatever does not kill you leaves you a survivor - Jesus is NOT a bad word - MSB