We've been groomed to abuse

[FlickerOfLight]

I have to get this off my chest. I've learned too much, and see too much to just let this go without saying. 

I have studied abuse, extensively. I have also studied psychology to great extent.


One thing I learned, and almost immediately out of the gate in studying all of this. 

(As it was presented to me by my first teacher on the subject)

"The foundation of abuse is forcing your own views or opinions on others."

Read that again. 

Now...Marinate on that...

We are all groomed to force our opinions on each other. To ridicule and judge those who hold a different opinion or view. 

Social media has made this a billion times worse.

Now we abuse for fun. With a keyboard.

Not to mention politics.

And religion.

As well as the things that go in homes, families and relationships.


Anytime we force our own views or opinions on any other human being, we are being abusive. 


Think about what it means to "force" opinions and views on others. It is very different from sharing opinions and views.

We have all been groomed to abuse one another. 


Stop.

(That was for the world. Not this site)

[Michigan Swamp Buck]

What is the difference between sharing and forcing a personal view or opinion? Is sharing speaking one's mind openly and freely while forcing more like holding someone hostage and putting a gun to their head?

I'm unsure how I could force someone to agree with my views or opinions if they don't listen or refuse to agree.

You do offer a definition, "To ridicule and judge those who hold a different opinion or view." That doesn't force anyone to believe anything, it just makes you look small-minded and judgemental. It may get abusive if the ridicule is off-base or over the top, but no one has to sit there and take that, esp. online. Just do something else and ignore the jerks.

[FlickerOfLight]

Example 1:

Husband decides to clean the floors. He likes to sweep every day. It relaxes him. Wife comes in and sees him using a broom. She tells him there is a vacuum in the closet that he should use. Husband says he likes using the broom. Wife says no. It does not get the floors clean enough. Man disagrees. Knowing full well he can clean the floors just as well with a broom. But the Wife insists. Her opinion is the vacuum works better. Man like using the broom. It's quite and relaxing. The vacuum is too loud and gives him a headache. Wife insists he uses vacuum. She even tells him if he uses the broom she will just go behind him and redo all of it. 

Man just wants to sweep the floors. Wife intercedes and tells him how to do it. Forces him to do it her way.....or theirs hell to pay (one way or another). Man no longer enjoys sweeping the floor, and is robbed of this simple pleasure.


This is abuse.


Example 2.

Mom's a Christian. Her 21 year old daughter is not. Mom wants daughter to "get saved and go to heaven." Daughter thinks this is ridiculous. Daughter eventually needs something from mom one day. Mom says, "If you go with me to church, I will do it." Knowing how uncomfortable it makes her daughter. Mom thinks daughter will go to hell if she doesn't follow her beliefs. Daughter thinks Mom's beliefs are ridiculous and wants nothing to do with it. Mom uses her resources to "try and save her daughter." Not knowing she is pushing daughter further away from her and God.

Guess what....  abuse. (Even worse, weaponized Messiah)

Example 3:
Husband works and wife stays home and raises their kids. Wife wants a new dress, but Husband doesn't think she needs one. Husband tells her, "I make all the money around here. I'll decide how we spend it." Wife doesn't get dress.

Abuse.

Example 4:
Divorced Husband and wife share a child. Xwife is still bitter about divorce. So, she uses the child to make the man's life hell every which way she can. She says bad things about her x, the child's father, in front of their child. Putting ideas into this child's mind about their father. Their own shifty views and opinions about this child's dad.

Weaponized children...
Abuse.

These are all ways of forcing your own views or opinions on others.

I can go on.

[FlickerOfLight]

Phase 2 of this thought. 

If, forcing your own views or opinions on others is the foundation of abuse the the pillar of abuse would be to "force your own will on another."