Quote:Observations
 
 
Due to my time alone, I finished three books yesterday.  And believe me, that's a lot of coloring.

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What did our parents do to kill boredom before the internet?  I asked my 26 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.

I tried donating blood today...NEVER AGAIN!  Too many stupid questions:  
Who's blood is it?  Where did you get it from?  Why is it in a bucket?
  
There's nothing scarier than that split second when you lose your balance in the shower and you think, "They are going to find me naked."

Today, I melted an ice cube with my mind just by staring at it.  It took a lot longer than I thought it would.
  
Struggling to get your wife's attention? Just sit down and look comfortable.

Just sold my homing pigeon on eBay for the 22nd time.
  
I grew up with Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope.  Now there's no jobs, no cash, and no hope.  Please don't let anything happen to Kevin Bacon.
  
Shout-out to everyone who can still remember their childhood phone number but can't remember the password they created yesterday. You are my people.
  
One minute you're young and fun.  And next, you're turning down the stereo in your car to see better.
Think you're old and you will be old. Think you are young, and you will be delusional.
When I offer to wash your back in the shower, all you have to say is 'yes' or 'no'.  Not all this "Who are you and how did you get in here?" nonsense.
Not in jail, not in a mental hospital, not in a grave—I'd say I'm having a good day.

(01-27-2024, 09:44 AM)727Sky Wrote:

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Shout-out to everyone who can still remember their childhood phone number but can't remember the password they created yesterday. You are my people.

Quote:Aphorisms.

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 Aphorism is a statement of truth or opinion expressed in a concise and witty manner.
♦ I read that 4,153,237 people were married last year. Not to cause any trouble... but shouldn’t that be an even number?
♦ I find it ironic that the colours red, white and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
♦ When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their bodies . Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts
♦ Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
♦ You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone? That's common sense leaving your body .
♦ My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!
♦ I think my neighbour is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
♦ Money talks ... but all mine ever says is good-bye.
♦ You're not fat, you're just easier to see.
♦ If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
♦ I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"
♦ The location of your letterbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a dressing gown before you start looking like a mental patient.
♦ Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch.
Last but not leased!
 "Diapers and politicians should be changed often..., and for the same reason" Mark Twain